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The big decision: no more time for underwear!

on April 20, 2012

If you are a mother of twins and in the phase of potty training, you will need a minimum of 20 underwear pieces in your closet and most probably daily underwear wash. Since I love neatness and tidying up, I was so keen on folding each tiny piece of underwear every day.

 

This is the same with the 160 block pieces usually spread in cold blood on my carpet around 10 times a day. I can tell I am much better in counting now compared to the time I was studying math at school! For the past two years, when my twins have started more active motor skills, I took it as an obligation to collect each piece of toys usually found on the carpet, under sofas and chairs, on tables, under tables, in between cushions, inside their cars and recently in the fridge! Akh, I am laughing while writing this now, but it is really hard to keep up a perfect tidy place when having toddlers around. It just adds to the stresses I face as a mother on secondly basis!

 

With school time nearing, I have been highly thinking of homeschooling. I am convinced I want to spend more time with my twins. I am more thinking of the great passion for education they will obtain when they learn that knowledge can be sought in fun endless ways. Speaking of homeschooling is so recurrent those days for me. Although few people choose that path of education for their kids, I have chosen to put myself in a community where I feel all people do this and odds only put their kids into schools (with all due respect to each person’s decision of course).

 

Granted, I feel so much worried about taking such a resolution. Although I know it is the best to do for my kids, I feel I don’t bear within the necessary characteristics to proceed with my decision. I am TOO impatient, moody, egocentric sometimes, disorganized and more of that does not come to my mind right now. Having twins adds to the load as I won’t be taking it step by step; I will be forever distinguished of normal moms with an extra dose!

 

Stress … it is the word I daily live with and mostly fear because it leads me into a way of two: the strong character that challenges it and in turn brings out the best ideas for cooperating and interacting with her kids or the impatient yelling frazzled mom who shouts all the time. I believe kids have the right to be silly, it is part of their innocence but we are too arrogant that we want to accept their sweet silliness and dump their ill silliness. We sometimes mess things up and take our kids for the life stresses we are facing which has totally nothing to do with them! If I am to homeschool my twins, I think I will need to reconsider ways to deal with my stresses and arrange my priorities.

 

Today, I have found out I need to go with things that I do not highly accept to keep my temper up. I don’t have to fold up each of their underwear pieces everyday if this is going to load me and would give me more 20 minutes of relaxation. I don’t have to collect every single paper on the ground at night if I can do that in the morning when I have had enough sleep. I can give them time of their own playing or messing with whatever when I lay still on the couch waiting for them to come back and jump on me or pull my hair. Yes, I can still be the responsible loving mother with less stresses because I have CHOSEN to lessen my loads. Small trivial decisions count if you want to be a distinguished mother. I won’t dump my kids into schools because, like other moms claim that they need that free time when the kids are away, I would do that when I am fully convinced this is the best for them and will yield a better education than the one I can offer them at home.

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